After being married to an amazingly handsome man for two years who had spent nearly 40 years of his life masturbating to porn often at least once a day, I can attest that it has destroyed his capacity to have a normal sex life. Or at least something has.

My previous relationship with a non-porn user was incredible. This user? He has significant erectile dysfunction, inhibited arousal patterns, and severe intimacy problems. His love-making style is bizarre.

Oh, and this is not an age issue. The non-porn user was older. And he had no dysfunction. None.

So? What’s causing the problem? Sure, a research group consisting of two people is only anecdotal material. I realise that.

But, you know what? I vote that using porn as an arousal trigger is a significant problem. And, excessive use helps some men avoid the tougher work of learning how to be intimate with another person. Maybe there isn’t a lot of hard science behind the NoFap movement. At least not yet. Something, however, is going horribly wrong.

Psychologist/Author. Quora & Medium Top Writer. Mom of three, Autistic woman, Relationship expert kerry@kerrymcavoyphd.com

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