Eloi, Thanks for your questions.

I was not his first wife. I have interviewed several others and discovered all of them report the same behaviors.

So apparently, his addiction started in his late adolescence. It included frequent masturbation throughout each day and the use of porn whenever there was an opportunity. He also sexted upward to forty or fifty women and “dated” seven or more women at once. The only way he could keep this many relationships straight was through the use of cliff notes of their vital details.

I first noticed something off while we dated, but I had no idea what the behavior implied. Once we were married, he used fake work trips as an excuse to fly off and meet other women. I trusted him, not aware of any of this until one of several women spied us and then found my FB feed, which revealed our wedding. She contacted me. At that point, we sought help.

A sex addiction assessment tool indicated he was seriously ill. I still had no idea the scope of the disorder since he lied and practiced a regular habit of deception.

As the relationship fell apart, that the scope of his behavior became clearer. It also included a habitual use of sex workers.

I now realized that almost nothing was real. I offered a way of life he wanted. It wasn’t about loving me. He felt he was entitled. To all it all.

I am writing a “tell-all” memoir about this marriage due out next year.

Does this help?

Written by

Psychologist/Author. Quora & Medium Top Writer. Mom of three, Autistic woman, Relationship expert kerry@kerrymcavoyphd.com

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