Excellent article. And, yes, maddening.

This kind of questioning happens when you’re widowed as well. My sons were adults (18, 23, 26) when their dad died. That was nearly five years ago. I STILL get questioned about how my life decisions might impact them.

If I move to new area, I hear, “How are the boys doing with that?” It’s like women’s lives are tethered indefinitely to others. We are not allowed happiness unless it comes after everyone else’s has been attained and they are comfortable.

I’m sorry but I won’t do that. It’s an impossibility first off. And it’s ridiculous.

So now I push back. The worst thing is that these comments are posted on my social media profile. So I respond with, “my kids are doing as well as yours have with your latest decision to do ..(blah blah blah). Aren’t kids resilient? We’ve raised some great ones!” Or some such thing.

I think people are getting the point. LOL It’s been happening less often. Or maybe they don’t want to be call out. But point being — I’m done. No more. This is bullshit.

Written by

Psychologist/Author. Quora & Medium Top Writer. Mom of three, Autistic woman, Relationship expert kerry@kerrymcavoyphd.com

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