My husband and I were married 31 years. He put work first, dedicating 50 to 70 hours a week. He left everything else to me. I was also working so it buried me. Was killing me. We went years like this.

I was so lonely. I tried everything to pull him back in- regular dates, more sex, and greater interest in his work. He’d happily say he was the luckiest man in the world, but nothing changed.

Then he learned he had terminal cancer. His paradigm shifted, and he saw himself in a new light. He grieved and fussed over the damage he’d done to me. To our marriage. But it was too late. He couldn’t fix it. Time was up.

He died 5.5 months later. Sad and broken over the marital failure.

So what is it that men fear? I don’t know, but I hope you all figure it faster than my late husband or you’ll end in the same position as him – Deeply regretful but out of time to change a thing.

Great article, except I wished it had the magical answer! :)

Written by

Psychologist/Author. Quora & Medium Top Writer. Mom of three, Autistic woman, Relationship expert kerry@kerrymcavoyphd.com

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